Friday, December 18, 2015

OH DEAR. WATERBOARDED BY BALLAST POINT's "HABANERO SCULPIN"

Everyone's looking for some new kind of kick. Something they ain't had. Some new kind of buzz. They wanna go hog mad. So yeah, I can certainly understand the temptation for a brewer to make new ales with everything and anything under the sun - rose thistle, pressed sea buckhorn, yard trimmings and yes, habanero peppers. I mean, I'm the knucklehead who bought this BALLAST POINT "HABANERO SCULPIN", after all. I am not looking for the umpteenth undifferentiated saison nor plain jane IPA or even another soul-sucking sour most of the time - I want to go hog mad, in a good way.

Sometimes, however, it's in a bad way. Such was the case when I, in a classic case of transference, extrapolated the good juju I got from "GRAPEFRUIT SCULPIN" onto this hot pepper IPA, and hoped for something similar. Not in the least. This is a total hot sauce jolt, a real slapper of spicy throat damage and not anything one might find "appealing" in a beer. It's a dare, a boast, a brag - not something you bust out with yr hard-partyin' bros (or in my case, with my wife & son on a Thursday night). Sort of like using "Dave's Insanity Sauce" on your tacos in 1995 was. Is this still an IPA? Who knows - I can't taste anything any longer. Imagine hot sauce scorch and IPA tongue deadening in one little 12-ounce bottle. Now doesn't that sound better than that other beer you were considering? An exceptionally unenjoyable ordeal. 3.5/10.

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